I haven’t posted for awhile, mainly because I’ve been overwhelmed with all I need to do and not able to get a handle on much of it. 2017 was a tough year for us. Dan had two heart attacks and a number of other health problems. I lost count of the number of times I called 911 and followed the ambulance to the emergency room. And then there was his helicopter ride. I stayed strong and calm through all of this because my faith remained strong and I knew I was not alone. Thank God, Dan is doing well now, but his age is showing and the health problems remain. As a result, I’ve had to take on most of his responsibilities and it’s now my job to keep our world in order. Sometimes it feels like I have the weight of the whole world on my shoulders. I have a lot to learn and some of it doesn’t allow much time for OJT at this point in our lives. So, some evenings when I head for bed my mind goes into high gear and I fall into a worry well I can’t escape. There’s no sleep for hours as negative thoughts steal my motivation and temporarily destroy my problem-solving skills.
That’s the downside but there is an upside and some days I can see it when I focus in the right direction, that place where I find my strength. All I need to know is found in the book of Matthew. Mark, and John give accounts of Jesus walking on water, but Matthew includes Peter’s experience. And that’s the one I need. I’m so much like Peter!
As long as my faith is strong I can handle it all and imagine what it feels like to walk on water. But when I take my eyes off the source of my strength, and focus on all the problems piling up around me. I don’t know what to do when my faith falters, and just like Peter when he focused on the billowing waves, I begin to sink.
But Peter’s story doesn’t end here and neither does mine.
When Peter began to sink, he cried out to Jesus. Jesus recognize his “little faith,” took his hand, and helped him back in the boat. What is comes down to is this, when I am weak, Jesus is strong. When I trust him, seek His guidance, and do what needs to be done. All is well when I turn my eyes upon Jesus.